Push the button

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Sometimes, I feel like I need an actual submit button. Sometimes, I fight submission tooth and nail. Sometimes, I feel like submitting is just giving in. Sometimes.

Other times, most of the time, I can think of nothing but submitting. Every morning I make the bed, I silently reflect on how I want the day to go…with the kids, with life, with Sir. Lately, my reflection is more about my submission. How can I be better? How can I submit and please Him when He is at work all day? How can I quiet the negative words in my head? I’m happiest when submitting, so why in the world do I put up such a fight?

I think about these things daily. I’ve always been a pretty happy girl, but only in this last year have I found true  contentment. I never understood I wasn’t content until I gave my submission. Now, I cannot fathom my world without D/s or feeling that life-altering contentment it brings.

So, today…

I will be in control of my actions, doing everything with true purpose.

I will take hold of my sharp tongue, making sure my words lift up and speak the language of my soul.

I will pay special attention to my thoughts, letting go of insecurities and focusing on my beautiful life.

I will be thankful for every single blessing, big and small, and toss everything else to the wind.

It is going to be a good day.

shygirl

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3 thoughts on “Push the button

  1. I love how you found inspiration within yourself… To me this shows your true desire to submit fully! Sometimes it’s just a matter of wrapping your brain around it and embracing it. The insecurities that hold pieces of you back, find strength deep inside yourself to release them. For the longest time I was holding a piece of myself back…afraid of loosing “my sense of self” as I always referred to it, afraid to start a complete new way of thinking and life with my husband of 20 years. After many struggles and a huge learning curve, I gave in to the trust I had in my Sir, and my deep desire to submit fully to him. I can say now, that there is no going back, and that once I submitted fully, we have found a happiness beyond our wildest dreams.

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  2. we all have those days…I have gotten up and with telling myself why am I doing this to my self.
    Its a lot of work for what…when I only see Sir maybe 1 day a week. i want to open my mouth the minute Sir comes through the door and let loose. In such a rant that Sir would totally think I lost it.
    But…I step back and reset myself by asking myself what do truly want…life as before or what I have now. My heart will always direct me to submitting because its something you want and feel
    inside you. Our head sometimes tells us different and i believe its a good thing because it makes us reflect on our submissive nature and not lose sight on what our role is in D/s and it also makes us stronger in what we do everyday.or what we can do better. If we didn’t have these days we would lose sight and not try harder maybe even give up. So I believe this days keep us on track
    look at it as a positive and not a negative.It pushes us in the right direction.
    Lts

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  3. I could have written this myself! I frequently ask myself these same things. I actually made a bratty comment to my Husband the other day….and asked myself then too. He is still trying to understand my submission, but we are working on it. I too am at my happiest and most content when I am submitting.

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