disobedience not tolerated

“Your Dom will take disobedience seriously, because they care enough to make you obey.”

I’ve been working on this post for weeks and just deleted every last word. Ahhh!
I know punishment and/or correction isn’t a part of every D/s relationship. I also know there are many differing views on it.

That said, Sir does take corrective action when I disobey or step out of line. He is not overly strict, but I am never allowed to be disrespectful. I can disagree (at certain times), I can ask for something to be explained or expounded on, I can get angry… But I must always stay humble and am never to do it in a way that’s disrespectful.

Let me tell you, that’s harder than it sounds!! I have quite the mouth on me and bad words are like a security blanket when I’m upset. Seriously, the struggle is real.

I hate getting in trouble. I hate disappointing Sir. But I love that He cares enough to put a stop to it. There was a little while there, where I wasn’t doing so great with all the things life was throwing at me, and He eased up, let me get away with a bit more. You’d think I’d appreciate the leeway. Nope, not me! Instead, I felt like I didn’t really matter, like He did not care. That wasn’t the case, but I felt it in my soul… And also felt bad, wrong, fucked up for missing His punishment, something that I hate anyway. I could not figure out why I hated His graciousness or why I needed Him to be harder on me. I really needed firm direction and strict guidance. I was foundering and I was a mess!

And then I came across that quote at the top and something clicked. I think I even said outloud “Yes! That!”. I sent it to my Sir immediately. No comments, just the quote. He seemed to agree and we had a conversation. He explained His easiness with me. I know now that He was coming out of a place of love and concern. His leniency was out of care for my fragility. I let Him know it was not working!! Things immediately got back to normal.

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These days I don’t need a whole lot of correction because I’ve grown – just don’t ask about this morning. 😉 When I do happen to fall back into my old ways, Sir is right there to remind me of who I am and how I am to behave. Whether it’s right or wrong, I still need His correction and I am so thankful that Sir cares enough to make me obey.

~shygirl

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4 thoughts on “disobedience not tolerated

  1. Damn I’m screwed! My level of patience is that of a screaming, pouting toddler sometimes! (Also don’t ask about this morning, giggles:) Great post…and love the quotes. I struggle with this a lot. We haven’t had consistency in this area…and it leaves me feeling confused:/

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  2. Master and I have been discussing the concept of correction and punishment for the last several months. I feel like I need more concrete structure around this and hoping we are working toward it. I also hope that I don’t find myself thinking “yeah, be careful what you wish for” – you know what I mean? I totally for her limits, boundaries and have a clear cut consequences – and we haven’t been doing that. At all. But I am excited that we are moving forward with it – I know I just need to take a deep breath, be patient, and let him meet us there. I had Siri read me this post while I was out for a walk last week, and then went to your blog looking to see if you have more on this topic from your experience. I have been reading the Mestic disciplined life but most of them really are not D/S and we totally are. So I am trying to get my head around the domestic discipline concepts in a DS relationship. I’m very curious to see how you are managing these waters.

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