music things to say

It’s been a minute since I threw any music onto these pages and I thought it was about time I did. OK GO isn’t a new band, by any means, but definitely worth a listen (or fifty). They are super fun and their videos are groundbreaking. 

Here are three songs I’m currently way into, and why. 🙂

Looks like it’s time to decide
Are you here?
Are you now?
Is this it?
All of those selves that you tried
Wasn’t one of ’em good enough?

I love those lines because they are questions I try to answer all of the time. Is the person I am today who I really am? Maybe another day, another version of me, was better. It’s one thing to always try to grow, but I think it is another to constantly wonder if you’re good enough. That uncertainty can steal you away from the here and now. I want to improve, of course I do, but I also want to be content and confident enough to say “this is it, this is me.” 

It all seemed so perfect, it all seemed like everything was right
It all seemed so perfect, it all seemed so fine, until it was not

That doesn’t need much elaboration, does it?! Everything is great, until it’s fucking not. Whether it’s because we weren’t reading the signs, or blindsided, or maybe the stars misaligned and everything went sideways -whatever the scenario – things are generally good, until they aren’t.

Cause nothin’ ever doesn’t change, but nothin’ changes much

This is probably the biggest, most profound,  succinct way to sum up what I am trying to get my mind around this year. Everything changes. Everything, whether you want it to or not. Life is change. Ultimately, though, most things don’t change a whole hell of a lot. Things can change, people can change, but in the end, nothing really changes much. Both those thoughts are scary for me. All of the change, but still not very much. I have changed a hell of a lot this year, but under all the change and growth (?), I am still me, same as I ever was. Argh! Hurts my brain! 

Anyway… Back to the music… Happy Weekend! 


monday musings (on a tuesday)

Water stained, crinkly, well-loved paper, purple words, favorite pen (of the moment), breaking it down, building it up, searching, striving for growth. 

Happy Tuesday, blogland. 

May all of our neighbors stop popping off fireworks during sleeping hours! (Or perhaps that’s just mine?)


…she falls flat…

This isn’t what she envisioned.
Nothing ever is.
Her mind writes the script
Of secrets never uttered.
Maybe a hint,
A subtle suggestion,
Flirting eyes here and there.
Trying and failing at every turn.
Eventually, she caves.
Veiled words fall from her mouth
Onto ears that will not hear,
Crashing instead on the ground.
Mocking. Teasing. Tortured.
Muted once again,
Embarrassed and ashamed,
Until her soul is safely tucked away.
Denied reciprocity –
Feelings, damn them,
Such an outdated currency.
Nothing more to discuss.
Resurrection, her foolish hope.
Knocked off the pedestal of the past,
Moving on, through new days,
Only skimming the surface,
Intentionally aloof.