Thinking [rough] Thursday

I like the rough.

I like the words that make me bristle.
The words that initially shock, but make me melt into a puddle.

I like the firm grip when maybe I’m not listening well enough.
The grip that tells me I am not on my own – I am accountable, always, to Him.

I like the demands that cannot be ignored, lest consequences be given.
The demands that overwhelm and release me.

I like the strikes that make holding position impossible, that make me cry.
The strikes that wash away my guilt and shame, allowing me to start over.

I like the hands that hold me down, that constrict, that insist.
The hands that hurt, love, and heal.

I like the force that slams mouth, fingers and cock into me, gentleness lost.
The force that tells me there is nowhere else, no one else.

I like the bruises that linger for days, a constant reminder of who’s boss.
The bruises so tender, telling me, whispering “you are loved”.

I like the rough.

image

Happy Thursday…hope it’s rough!!
~shygirl

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Thinking [sleep] Thursday

Oh come on, I’m not going to talk about the benefits of sleep!  No way!  Today, I’m thinking about the benefits of LESS sleep, of staying up late, and why it makes for happy, connected couples.  Don’t misunderstand:  I LOVE sleep!  I mean, I really love it.  I love getting under my covers, adjusting my head on the pillow just right, relaxing my body and drifting off.  LOVE.  I love sleep almost as much as I love showers and baths, and that should tell you everything.

The past little bit, I’ve been a tad sleep-deprived and, I never thought I’d say it, but I love that deprivation even more!  How is that possible?  What could be better than sleep after a long day?  Oooooh… I think I should make a list!  Surprised? 😉

Things that are better than sleep:

1.  Laughing.  Staying up late, telling dirty jokes, watching silly movies, making silly faces.  Food for the soul, I tell you.

2.  Video games.  Playing video games gives your eyes and hands something to do, your brain is occupied, and your mouth is able to speak freely.  Maybe you prefer cards, or crafts, or doodling…whatever it is you like… distraction is a great way to open up.  Which leads me to…

3.  Conversation.  The conversations had when you ought to be in bed are always some of the best.  The later it gets, the more honest you get, the better your life gets.  Truly.

4.  Dirty texts/photos.  I must say, this is fairly new to me, but it is one of the highlights of my day!  As the night wears on, everything becomes amplified… makes for a very happy girl, with major problems in the pants.

5.  Snuggles.  Sometimes, staying up late means snuggling on the sofa with my Sir while many of the other things mentioned are going on.  Safe and adventurous at the same time… that’s the perfect combination!

6.  Ropes and bars and cuffs, oh my.  Playtime can take a while… just don’t look at a clock!  Worth every single second of sleep sacrificed. (hello, alliteration)

7.  Oh okay… SEX!  That’s right… generally, all of the above lead straight into sex.  I’d rather fuck than sleep any day.  No question. You may have noticed that I put sex last… although it is my very favorite thing to do… it isn’t the most important.  The connections that occur during those late nights are far more important than any dick-in-box games you could come up with.

I implore everyone… as soon as you can… put that early alarm clock out of your mind, forget that you’ve done 5 million things during the day and just stay up late, together, and make it count!

To my Sir. And to number four…
lose sleep

kisses!
~shygirl

Thinking [boxes] Thursday

routine

I would say that makes sense, but here’s the thing:  I kind of like routine.  I do not like monotony – I do like to switch it up, but within the safe confines of my routine. I realize that may sound a little crazy, a little impossible, but that’s how I am most comfortable.  A basic routine… very general… with many variations inside of that big ol’ box of comfort.

comfortzone

Sir, however, keeps me teetering on the edge of my comfort zone.. and often pushes me right on over.  I was recently given a task I thought I would not be able to complete.  I may have cried a little bit and I definitely had a lot of anxiety over it.  In fact, I went so far as to tell Sir I just couldn’t do it.  I was swiftly informed that wasn’t even an option.

againstthewind

He said “Rise my beautiful girl.”  (swoon…)  After words like that, how the hell could I not comply?  And so I did.  I completed the task with red cheeks, shaky hands and more embarrassment than a person should be allowed to feel.  Even more than that, though, I felt pride and relief that I was able to overcome those insecure feelings and just get it done.  I fought through it and I tried my best.  I haven’t gotten any feedback just yet, but I feel pretty good about the job I did.

 

As Sir keeps pushing me outside my box of safety, the lines blur more and more.  Soon enough, I imagine the box will disappear altogether and then where will my safety lie!?  I actually know that answer: with my Husband!  He has always been my safety and my comfort.  I see now that the box has only served as a place for me to hide and I want it gone.

neverseealone

So, for my Sir, my Husband, who has always been there to push me and to catch me – I am forever indebted!  Truly, I am not the boss (still working on that bracelet) and never want to be again.  He knows what he’s doing.  He knows, better than I, what I need.  Sir brings out the best… the MOST… in me and I will always do my utmost to rise for Him.

~shygirl