kneel and be still

I sink to my knees and lose myself in you.

Your needs are the only thing I focus on.

That is how it is supposed to go, always

But sometimes, I am impatient

You leave me waiting and my mind ramps up

frustration and sadness usually come first

followed by doubt and insecurity

I am so disappointed in myself

Internally scolding and berating

If I cannot do this, can I even BE this?

I focus on my breath

Count it in, count it out

Pleading with my mind to just be still

I close my eyes again, rest my hands

Please let everything fall away

Just be me, just be His

I settle

He tells me I am a good girl

All is right and I know

Even during the struggles,

I AM this.

– shygirl