the stool

It took all day to come up with something that REALLY reminded me of submission. My head isn’t in a good place with this. But as things do, it came to me when I wasn’t even thinking about it. 

This rickety, old, busted up thing is my favorite. 

It reminds me of the beginning and the end, of love and hurt, of pain and soothing. It reminds me of our old closet and the awakenings that happened there, but also the tears and struggle. It makes me sad to remember, but also happy. 

It is a physical reminder that even when things feel broken and irredeemable, there can still be hope. If it happened once, it can happen again. Good. And bad. 

Trusting, especially when you feel the most alone. Surrendering the fear. Embracing the current.

This is submission.

Happy New Year! 

~shygirl

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delete 

Frame by frame

Arrow back 

Smiling faces

Pretty dresses

Christmas presents

Then I hit them 

Those others

And I feel…

I’m feeling…

Nothing. 

Dig deeper

There must be something

Some feeling

(embarrassment)

So many

Arrow back

Faster

(regret)

Faster

(deceived)

Faster

Flying through them

(used)

So damn many

Full speed

Flying by

Feeling nothing 

(detached)

(duped)

(dumb)

Arrow back

The end

Really the beginning

Feeling 

Nothing

(mistaken)

Feeling

Nothing.

Deleted.